One thing that bothers a lot of single people is the fact that they might never find a way out of single-hood because they just can’t seem to find a suitable partner. Marriage is not a game and almost everyone fantasizes a perfect partner to go through life with. Fortunately for some of us, we don’t wait too long before finding someone that matches our dream guy or lady. Sometimes, our dream match backfires and we wish we never even had a dream in the first place while for a lucky few, the dream choice is just perfect. And for the rest of us, we just keep hoping that the angel of our dreams will walk into our lives when we need them the most. But does that angel really exist? This is a question we ask ourselves after 5, 6, 10 or 20 attempts at dating or relationships. We have tried our best to package ourselves rightly, we have tried to carefully pick the perfect partner and somehow, it just doesn’t work out fine. We have tried almost everyone within our friendship network; we have even dated Mr. /Miss A to Z. And as we grow older, the pressure to get married or get a family started becomes more and everyone expects us to make an announcement as soon as possible. But whilst they are waiting for that announcement, we are so careful because we don’t want to end up in a hell hole like we’ve seen some of our friends do. And the wait seems to be like forever and we keep wondering if we will ever find the right partner.
Well, I got good news for you. You will find the right partner and the person really exists. But it’s up to you to recognize them when you do. Most of the time, our dream partner doesn’t exactly come in perfect packages. And we could completely miss out on a perfect relationship because we are busy trying to ensure the perfect candidate comes with all the features of our dream package. Below are a few tips on how you can work towards a marriage based relationship without stress.
Be sure of your packaging: You can’t expect to get what you can’t give. Marriage is a reciprocal relationship. You can’t parade yourself as a troublemaker and expect to have a peacemaker as a partner. Unlike Physics, in relationship matters, like attracts like. It is only people that think like you or agree with your ideas about life that would hover around you. So, if you don’t like the options you keep getting for a life partner, then maybe it’s time to review YOU. You can’t expect an angel to walk into your life and remain there when your attitude is worse than that of Lucifer himself; be the dream spouse you desire and you will see them walk into your life sooner or later.
Never look for the ‘perfect’ spouse: The biggest mistake many people make is to look for 100% perfect partners. You can’t imagine something or someone in your head and expect to wake up one morning and find exactly what you imagine at your doorstep. Perfect spouses are made, not ready made. Human beings don’t come in boxes or price tags. What is perfect for you might be imperfect for some other person. Therefore, you are the one to patiently work on certain aspects of your darling partner till their imperfections even begin to soothe you. Many newly-weds fight like they are completely incompatible but after a couple of years, we all notice that they appear to be a ‘perfect couple’. It’s very simple, they didn’t metamorphose into perfect beings, they only learned to accommodate each other’s flaws and turn them into a ‘perfect relationship’. So, when looking out for your dream partner, don’t expect them to come in a complete package. You might just be the one to have to complete it for them. Remember, no one is perfect; not even you.
Avoid comparison: People differ in style, reasoning and character. Never compare or contrast one relationship with another. Focus on a particular person and love them for who they are. Don’t wish for your partner to be like that of your friend; you never know what your friend is really passing through in their own relationship. And stop wishing you can merge two people into one because you can identify those qualities you desire in both of them but not at equal range or not even the same qualities. No one chases two rats and catches any. Focus on building a relationship with at least one of them or you may end up losing them both. Apply wisdom, especially when dealing with the hearts of human beings like you.
Prayer helps: No matter how foggy situations like these seem, prayer is always a way to submit your fears to a higher power and give your inner man the assurance that you are on your way to finding answers. Pray for your present and your future, and ensure you commit anyone you come across as a life partner into the hands of God. Human wisdom may fail but God remains your surest bet.